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July/August 2023

What’s up people of the cyberverse!

Sorry it’s been a little while; I think I missed a month (🙄 YOU did! - Sian).

Apologies. Must try harder!

We’ve had a busy few weeks at Jump! Towers! After the first draft of 'JUMP 2' was finally finished, Sian waved her magic IT wand and turned it into a slick looking pdf which went out, under cover,

in the dead of night to a specially selected gang of willing and trusted volunteers who had

kindly agreed to not only read the draft but then return some quite detailed (hopefully)

constructive (scared emoji) feedback about what they thought. We hadn’t done it this way

before and it certainly felt all very grown-up stuff! The equivalent 'JUMP! 1' process was a

little more “off the cuff.” More along the lines of me approaching mates and having this

kind of conversation:

Me: 'Have you ever read a book?'

Mate: (slight pause) 'I think so.'

Me: 'Do you fancy reading another one?'

Mate: 'Mmmmm ok. Does it have pictures in it?'

So, like I said. Proper grown-up stuff now…….

(one of us has to be! By the way, are you going to let people know that JUMP2 finally has a title?!- Sian)

Apparently, these readers are called Alpha readers. I was initially hesitant when informed of

this as I couldn’t imagine the use of sending my heart felt, sensitive portrayal of a young

girl’s journey into the world of competitive sport (🤦🏼‍♀️ SPOILER ALERT! - Sian) to a load of arrogant Jeremy Clarksonesque Range Rover driving men!

It then got me thinking of some famous/infamous Alpha Males from history.

Julius Caesar comes to mind. A definite man’s man. He led from the front, striding through

the waves of the English Channel, slaying the Ancient British Welcoming Committee in his

wake, spearheading the first Roman invasion of Britain back in…..the day. This wasn’t even

the main invasion! This was just a little fact-finding soiree to see if Britain was all that.

What a man!

And then there was Henry the Eighth! What can you say about him? A man whose card-

carrying Alpha Male despotic megalomaniac tendencies seemingly had no bounds. We all

know about his most blood thirsty examples of cruelty and absolute corruption of power,

but few people know that he was a talented musician who composed the standout classic

from 'Now! Minus Five Hundred and Seventy Something – That's What I Call Music', Greensleeves.

A castle somewhere in Tudor England. King Henry suddenly hears the wistful melodic

tones of a lute drifting into the air and proceeds to investigate the source of this almost

celestial music.

Henry the Eighth: 'Humble lute player!'

Humble Lute Player: (startled) 'Oops, ever so sorry your Majesty. Was my innocent plucking

disturbing you in some fashion? No words can convey my sorrow at causing such an

infringement upon your quietude.'

Henry the Eighth: 'That song, that song you were playing just now.'

Humble Lute Player: (bowing, scraping obsequiously) 'Yes Your Majesty. That was

Greensleeves one of my earliest compositions and possibly the one I can say, in all heart felt

honesty, the one I am most proud of. Your Majesty, your interest in my humble offering to

the world is the crowning glory in my hitherto unremarkable existence.'

Henry the Eighth: (Dismissively) 'Yes, yes yes . But that song Greensleeves…..'

Humble Lute Player: 'Yes, Your Majesty……'

Henry the Eighth: 'I wrote that……'

Humble Lute Player: (expression that shows combination of concealed bemusement

combined with imminent fear of his own existence) 'Yes……………yes you did! To be honest I

don’t know what I was thinking.'

But apparently – Alpha Readers just literally means the FIRST people to read your draft, so I

don’t need to worry anymore.

Anyway, see you soon, Gary.

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